I headed out on a Monday morning with the goal of running
for 30 minutes for my first post-baby workout. About five minutes into my run,
I had to take a walk break. By fifteen minutes, I was huffing and puffing,
starting to sweat, and had a pretty rough side ache. Though I was seriously
struggling, I loved every minute of it. I had been impatiently waiting for this
day and had a smile on my face the entire run. It was so much fun, but I’d be
lying if I said it wasn’t defeating seeing how slow my time was compared to
what it used to be.
The strangers seeing me take really long walk breaks would have no clue that just a year ago I
was running for miles on end. Unfortunately, my knees are really terrible when
I’m pregnant, so I haven’t been able to go out for a run in almost five months,
which has brought me right back to square one. When I got home from my run, I
started to make some goals. It was hard writing them down realizing that they
are basically the same goals I made when I first started running eight years
ago.
I have a goal, or maybe just a dream, of running a 100-mile
ultra-marathon one day. As much as I would love to put this goal on a five year
plan, I know that it’s much further out than that. I’ve been either pregnant or
nursing for the last three years and I anticipate the coming years to be
similar. This dream of mine has had to be put on the backburner for now since I
go right back to square one after each pregnancy. I have had to accept that
there are seasons of life for everything, and this season of life doesn’t
include a 100-mile ultra-marathon.
I had a friend once tell me “a woman can have everything she
wants, just not in the same decade.” My current season of life is spent kissing
scraped knees, rocking babies to sleep, and having many sleepless nights. There
isn’t much “me” time, and that’s okay, because this season of life isn’t about
me… it’s about them. One day I’ll be able to run 100 miles, but for now, I’ll
do what I can to accomplish my “smaller” goals.
Published November 2017 in The Tremonton Leader
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